Topic: My past relationships

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My past relationships
22.05.2020 by User19017D30

In my past relationships I've never really made a move, even when I was in one for 6 months. I have been told by my friends that this is why my relationships don't last. It's not that I wouldn't want to I just never really felt the need to express myself in that way. Is there any advice on how to over come this. I'm trying to grow and expand my knowledge of trying to understand how other feel, and how it effects them.
Because I personally fell like I don't even understand myself.

27.05.2020 _T('by') Fish

I have a similar if not the same issue. I can't say that I have found a solution but I have a method I try to test; that method being to "try". I'm not saying "just do it!" When people have to learn skills like these that are too complicated to map out and logically approach they just try, the successful ones at least. The major reason that children learn languages better than adults is not because of neuroplasticity, its because children don't care if they get something wrong, they just try. So as long as you are doing something that looks a bit like what you want, you'll get closer to doing what you want. At least closer than if you didn't try at all. If you feel that you are trying as best you can and it's not working. Maybe make stuff up. Say that you love someone because of the odd way they smile even if that isn't entirely true or you aren't really sure how you feel about their smile (maybe tell your partner that you are doing this). If all else fails or just because you want to some social/expression counselling might help (not that I know of any).

Best wishes,

13.09.2020 _T('by') User57330L14

My marriage lasted 32 years. Looking back I think we were both Alexithymic so a reasonable match.