≡ Topic: my reaction comes a week too late

my reaction comes a week too late
28.04.2013 by nikoant

I believe i got this way after a near death experience and a boyfriend abusing me for over a year. I have gotten way better after 3 rounds of therapy over 4 years. Now however, i have a new boyfriend. He was abusive to me last weekend, but i didnt react to it then. tears came out of my eyes as he was mean to me, but the day after i forgave him and felt nothing. a week later i feel a lot of anxiety, i am depressed and nervous for everything i do. i lost all confidence at work. in one week. so then i call my mother, and i realize that what he did to me was not right and that my physical feelings (sleeping 10-11h per night, eat a lot, stomach cramps etc) probably are from his behavior. its like my body and mind need to sort out what happened before it can react physically. mentally i have no idea whats going on. i might cry, but without having feeling about it. Is this a typical reaction for anyone else? or do you usually feel physical signs immediately in a situation?

in a way, i get what you mean
14.11.2013 by Lie

it seems as though your mind needs to comprehend it a little bit or it starts to notice the pattern or logic as suggested by the norm.
we might feel the emotion but since we don't get it we don't know when we feel it. it can also mean that your subconscious recognizes the pattern or logic within it and decided to act on it. we are still human at some point.

i have a similar event. it was a year after not seeing the person who used to mistreat me. before i was passive but now, i don't realize or notice it but i am 'angry' at her whenever i come across her nowadays. my friends notice the change of the tone of my voice and the manner of speaking but i don't feel any anger at her at all.

re: OP
30.03.2014 by ttme123

that sounds more like depression than alexithymia, and given your history it's not surprising