Topic: tv, death, marriage and other traits

English Alexithymia Forum > Questions and Answers

tv, death, marriage and other traits
08.05.2015 by friendofalex

Do you become more involved with television characters than real people in your life? Do you do a great job of describing the emotions in a book or on tv but no ability to describe a real life scenario or situation?

When my friends Dad was dying, his Alexi wife sat and watched television instead of consoling him... what say you?

When my friends Alexi wife cooks dinner, she cannot decide on a menu, she must be told what to make. She never has an opinion about finances, house decor, politics, etc. She is void of opinions altogether. She does not gossip which is good but never engages in any discussion that involves making a stand.

When asked if she had fun, the answer is yes but most people you don't have to ask if they are having fun, you can just tell they are.

I am trying very hard to understand the Alexi personality. Please help me understand this friends Alexi wife whom I spend a great deal of time with but do not know anything about.

my similarities
10.05.2015 by metalface

First post here, let me see if I can help you.

There are several things here that I definitely do as well. I can analyze fictional character's emotions far better than real life ones. Not sure why. I have seen several girls crying, and I have never been able to understand why they were so emotional on my own. It probably has to do with how in a show, you can see the whole story, you have all the pieces so you can see why they feel a certain way, and typically it is accentuated by the author or director so the reason is easier to see. In real life I tend to analyze less as well, and unless asked to analyze something, I will generally not think too deeply on it.

When my friends Dad was dying, his Alexi wife sat and watched television instead of consoling him... what say you?

People with alexithymia tend to be rather unempathetic, so it is difficult to understand what your friend was feeling, or how to go about consoling him. Consoling someone who is emotionally unstable may just be uncomfortable or awkward for her, or it may simply not have crossed her mind that she should try to console him.

She is void of opinions altogether.

For me, there are very few things I have a real opinion on, my friends say I never contribute to decisions like where to eat. Usually the only sided I will pick are the most logical ones that have a good backing in research. Morally ambiguous things and minor things like what or where to eat can be more difficult to pick one side, because I do not view one as being better than another. With things like politics, I tend to simply not care. They are distant things that have no real right answer.

When asked if she had fun, the answer is yes but most people you don't have to ask if they are having fun, you can just tell they are.

My friend usually asks me this after we hang out, and my answer is always yes. Recently I was thinking about it, and I realized, like plankton, I’m not really sure what fun is. There isn't anything that changes to tell me I’m having fun. Is fun a discernable feeling? Or is it the action of doing something fun that is fun? I think I have about the same level of fun doing most anything, really.

A bit long, but I hope this sheds some light on her thought process.

odd
10.05.2015 by metalface

weird it shows my avatar as a non alexilthymic female.

I am a male with strong alexithymic traits, for the record.

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