Topic: I've just learnt I'm dating someone with Alixythemia

English Alexithymia Forum > Personal Experience

I've just learnt I'm dating someone with Alixythemia
04.06.2015 by jack

I'm a 35yom and I've just realised that my 25yof girlfriend is very likely "suffering" alixythmia (quotes as I don't know whether she suffers as I think she is very content with her life - I feel I'm the only source of angst). I haven't told her yet - unfortunately we aren't spending much time together at the moment through work. She said that she once considered whether she had aspergers or autism and knows that she doesn't. Whether she knows she has alixythemia I don't know. I suppose my dilemma is whether to tell her or not what I've learnt?

Phrase it as a helpful question....
04.06.2015 _T('by') DXS

"You said you had issues with this, might it be possible this is the issue? Here's an article...."

Don't flat out DIAGNOSE your friend. This will upset them.

thank you DXS
04.06.2015 _T('by') jack

...but I can't see the article.

because no article was included
05.06.2015 _T('by') metalface

there are certainly a wealth of articles to choose from, I believe DXS meant "choose an article and show her that".

you could start with the wikipedia page for it:

thank you both
05.06.2015 _T('by') jack

I'll consider doing that.

05.06.2015 _T('by') jack

would anyone know how to delete this conversation; if/when I choose to disclose this to her then I'd prefer her not to come on this forum and deduce that I've been consulting random people (albeit anonymous and appreciated).

removing things from the internet
06.06.2015 _T('by') metalface

tends to be impossible.

if she finds it just say you were asking for advice on this particular subject from people who may have some knowledge about it. the truth is often the simplest answer.

I apologize!
08.06.2015 _T('by') DXS

I really did attach an article, it didn't show up for some reason.

Oh, wait a minute.....
08.06.2015 _T('by') DXS

No, I didn't attach an article.

What I meant was to use it as a "suggestion" before you show her the article.

Same shoes
12.07.2015 _T('by') ScottMillican

Jack, I'm finding myself in the same situation. As a very expressive person of higher emotional intel, some of the factors of being with someone with Alexi can be difficult sometimes. I'm thinking I might ask her to take the test by reading the questions out loud to her. She's always been self aware and honest about her emotional limitations, and I actually think it may be good for her to know that there is a name for it, and she is very much not alone or a freak.