Topic: break through

English Alexithymia Forum > Personal Experience

break through
04.09.2015 by JudyJ

To other people I know this would sound like I'm a psychopath, but I had a break through today I'm excited about. I always would end up giggling when I would accidentally scratch or pinch my husband. I help him wash in the shower and help with his shoes. My automatic response to him saying ouch was me giggling. I hated my response and tried to hide it from him. Today I was helping him wash and I accidentally scrubbed to hard on his sunburn. I actually felt remorseful for my action instead of giggling. It was a relief to be able to feel the right emotion instead of something completely opposite or not knowing what to feel. I was diagnosed only a year ago and I feel like I'm making some progress.

Congratulations!
04.09.2015 by daughter

What kind of treatment, if any, led to your breakthrough?

re: congratulations
05.09.2015 by JudyJ

I was diagnosed with Alexithemia last year in Aug. at the Mayo clinic and I have been trying to figure out what my triggers are and responses. I had done this for most of my life and for the 15 years I have been married. My husband has been fabulous in my journey with this condition. He helps me through my seizures and was by my side at Mayo through my most violent of seizures. I am guessing my subconscious took over at that time and corrected my response to my action. I remembered today about his sunburn and made sure I was careful around his neck. I also paid attention to the way I felt even if I did accidentally hurt him. I also was trying something new and I am writing down memories from as far as I could remember. My family has been helping me with the details.

You are very brave to tackle it head on!
05.09.2015 by daughter

I never knew seizures could be a part of the recovery process. You are so lucky to have access to the Mayo Clinic, and your family sounds amazing. I hope you will continue to post your progress. :)

my journey
05.09.2015 by JudyJ

I had been having episodes of seizures for 20 years but all the doctors kept telling me it was anxiety. As I am getting closer to 40 they were getting worse usually around the time of my period. I finally got a doctor to listen to me and when he couldn't find the root of the seizures he sent me to a bigger facility. It was nice to finally have a diagnosis other than I was stressed and crazy. I ended up having a uterine ablation last year too, which help reduce my episodes. I had a couple of seizures in the last three weeks but it is soooo much better. I had not had any in four months. Keep your head up and if you need any more help from a patient side let me know.

Thanks!
06.09.2015 by daughter

What has your treatment included? Bio feedback? Medication? Cognitive therapy? or are you guiding your own treatment? Your progress sounds incredible. :)

Treatment
07.09.2015 by JudyJ

Even though the Mayo doctors say anxiety nor depression is not part of my problem, I do get Zoloft as a med to help with over stimulation that I have at times. I don't know if your mom may have the same problem but I would have a hard time sleeping at night, because my mind would go a million miles an hour. I do have a med I take now only when I'm having a bad night. Lack of sleep makes my alexithymia worse. I was told by the doctors to go do cognitive therapy for alexithymia though. I have a therapist that I was seeing for a year and a half. She helped me process some of my feelings that I wasn't sure about and identity some of my stressers. I only go see her on a need only basis now. You might talk to her primary physician for a referral or look up on health grades for a therapist in your area that specializes in cognitive therapy. Then you can go from there if she needs another doctor to prescribe meds to help.

Thanks for all your help
09.09.2015 by daughter

Your suggestions are great. I wish my mother was as motivated as you. I'm not sure she will actually accept treatment; she seems to really enjoy the attention and sympathy she gets from medical professionals whenever she gets bodily sensations she doesn't like. She says she doesn't want to be "sick" any more, but I'm not sure that's the case. It will be crushingly disappointing to have her not accept treatment.

I'm sure your family is very grateful that you are putting in so much effort. :)

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