Topic: can someone with alexithymia be an empath?

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can someone with alexithymia be an empath?
04.05.2018 by JoanjojoW

I am new to this whole thing. My question is 'can someone be alexithymia and empathetic. I have no empathy, yet I can understand others have emotions. I am just puzzled how someone can be both alexi and empathetic.

Empath
07.05.2018 by Roger1369

I’m and Empath and HSP, my personality type is INFJ.. So yes and Empath can have Alexithymia

Yes(?)
21.07.2018 by scarredlightning

I think so... but I think if it’s Alexi it could be a moral compass compensating??

Poles apart
15.09.2018 by Jute

To me the whole Alexi and Empath things are poles apart. If you don't understand, recognise or even experience your own emotions have can you possible empathise with somebody else's? I personally don't recognise most of my own emotions and as for other people's I only know what they're feeling if they tell me in plain English and if they do I find it embarrassing. Frankly couldn't give a toss about them, I just don't want to know.

Autistics and Psychopaths
30.09.2018 by Hsingai

Autistics often have poor logical empathy but have high emotional empathy. Just because you don't recognize your emotions doesn't mean they don't exist. jute you're a Psychopath, you lack emotional empathy. Hopefully your pro-social like James Fallon and not one that views the world as an unfair place, so that they can do whatever they want and not feel bad about it.

Armchair analyst
01.10.2018 by Jute

Gee, why did I spent several sessions and many hours with a psychologist, who diagnosed me with OCD and nothing else, when it took you just one post to diagnose me as a psychopath? Your 'diagnosis' is based on what? At the very least it's misguided and at worse it's a personal attack and a deliberate insult.

Autistics often have poor logical empathy but have high emotional empathy. Just because you don't recognize your emotions doesn't mean they don't exist.

If I'm aware of having emotions that I don't recognise then of course they must exist, that's simple logic, which I was already aware of.

My advice to you is, stick to replying to posts and don't make rash, unsupported statements and accusations about other users who you know next to nothing about.

This interaction is over. If you make any more personal attacks on me I'll report you to the site Admins.

In my defence.
01.10.2018 by Hsingai

ee, why did I spent several sessions and many hours with a psychologist, who diagnosed me with OCD and nothing else,Psychopathy isn't part of normal psychology, it part of criminality.Your 'diagnosis' is based on what?as for other people's I only know what they're feeling if they tell me in plain English and if they do I find it embarrassing. Frankly couldn't give a toss about them, I just don't want to know.

when it took you just one post to diagnose me as a psychopath?Jute had already made several posts here.

You were warned
01.10.2018 by Jute

This interaction is over. If you make any more personal attacks on me I'll report you to the site Admins.

Yet, you continue with the amateur psychology. I've reported you and this is my last communication with you. You have nothing to say that I wish to hear.

02.12.2018 by Misdiagnonsense

I'm very much an empath. I can feel what others are feeling, but I still have a difficult time expressing the emotion in words. I have difficulty pinpointing what exactly I am feeling, but feel tremendously.

05.12.2018 by Jute

I also have difficulty understanding my own feelings. At times they can be very intense but it would be difficult for me to categorize precisely what emotions I am actually experiencing. I have no idea what other people are feeling, unless they tell me in plain and unequivocal terms.

23.06.2019 by Sennomo

I guess I'm a "learned" empath.

Also perhaps partly because I'm a Buddhist and I practice compassion--I may not necessarily understand how it feels, but I definitely have the idea of being nice to other people hardwired in my brain and behaviors.

12.07.2019 by Tony_Sandy

Empathy is an act - sympathy is a feeling (sorrow for the other beings plight)

21.07.2019 by aletteinthemaze

@JoanjojoW asked, "Can someone with Alexithymia be an Empath." I believe it's possible because I sense that I'm married to someone who could be.

It sounds irrational, I know. How could someone who can't express what they're feeling (Alexi) be an Empath. What I've learned this year (to my shock) is that many are Empaths from trauma during childhood.

Just as is Narcissism (Narcissistic Personality Disorder). A traumatized or neglected child goes one way or the other. My brother has full blown NPD. I am an Empath (late bloomer to settled into this - 40's. I'm 50 now).

Sensitivity (ability to sense the invisible) is a natural human trait that we're born having access to. Trauma during childhood suppresses or expands your sensitivity. Me: I never knew if Mom would be happy, sad, angry, loving, violent, when I trusted, I was sexually abused, when I began to feel safe, I was abandoned, etc.

*** I learned that if I could sense, intuit, anticipate, feel what others were feeling, I could protect myself, get out of the way of danger ** -- like a deer and a lion in the bushes. The deer senses danger and runs to safety before the lion can attack. Most of the time).

Husband: Parents: Religious addicts. He was whipped, spanked, punished if he showed *any* emotion - from super excited to angry, any extreme emotion was 'the work of the devil'. Intuition was a sin.

My husband had a 'cognition experience' around age 9. He told his dad (excitedly, with a child's naivety, that he knew something before it happened). His dad mocked, minimized and stifled the experience. He said it was the 'work of a demon' and if he did it again, he would go to hell for eternity and no son of his was going to disgrace him like that.

If he was seen as doing something bad (child stuff, nothing truly bad), his said would say, "you feel you are___" and if he responded, "No dad, I don't feel that way. I promise! I feel ____," this would enrage his dad. He'd grab the paddle and spank him until he agreed that what he felt was what his DAD TOLD him he felt.

**** Husband learned as a child: "It's not safe to feel or show emotions. Detach from my emotions, disconnect."

My husband is not abusive physically or verbally. He's neglectful... unintentionally *sigh*. He filters reality. Anything that has too much emotion or feeling for him (learned as a child) is filtered out. If say, "I'm devastated" he hears "I'm angry" or "I'm sad."

Whether I'm crying from a cut on my thumb that happened chopping a cucumber or crying from the sudden death of someone close to me, it's registered in him as the same.

It's getting better, but it's a painful painful process for us both, each in our own way.

I'm learning through research and study (and desperation), that this filtering is programmed into him from childhood (it still hurts, nonetheless, and I feel his confusion and all of the feelings he can't recognize he's feeling when he feels them).

He has alexithymia. Thank God we know now. And he has me - Empath, intuitive, clarcognizant (all of this coming into alignment in me within the last 2 years).

He's got the "gift" -- I say. He just doesn't know how to feel it. You may too, and you're sensing it.

To all who read this: Answers are in Dr. Gabor Mate, YouTube-Richard Grannon, Dr. Jonice Webb (I'm sure many of you have heard of her already), Pete Walker's Book "From Surviving to Thriving," Dr. Judith Orloff (Empath AND Psychiatrist), YouTube-IANDSVideos "International Association for Near Death Studies"

With gratitude and appreciation for this discussion,

~ Alette


31.01.2020 by User71900F89

Bless you


04.03.2020 by Diezell

Someone with alexithymia can definitely be empathic. Although you might be disconnected from your emotions and your empathy, all those processes are still active in your subconscious mind influencing what you do.

17.03.2020 by icantcry

yes you can definitely be empathic and still not actually feel yourself. i think alot of my friends see me as someone who is because i have alot of friends who talk to me about things in their lives and their feelings towards it. i think i do a good job because they keep coming back but in my mind i really dont care, they just helping me pass the time


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Alexithymia - emotional blindness - is a personality trait characterized by the inability to identify and describe emotions in the self. Core characteristics of alexithymia are marked dysfunction in emotional awareness, social attachment, and interpersonal relationship.
Alexithymia is prevalent in approximately 10% of the general population and is known to be comorbid with a number of psychiatric conditions. Due the inability to cope with feelings and emotions as described in psychology there are counseling services to establish mental health.
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